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Saturday, April 12, 2008/ 11:58 PM i`d rather die then be here. I wish you could hear everything that i have to say. Because i am screaming for you to hear me. I`m screaming at the top of my lungs for you to just let go gracefully. I have run out of words to say to you because now i only know how to feel. I don`t know what else to say. But this just hurts. THIS JUST HURTS. Please stop please. I wish i was stronger then it would be easier. I wish i didn`t care so much then this would be easier. I wish i don`t take you seriously so then this would be easier. But i`m not and i can`t. SO please just stop. You are right sey. I deserve this. I deserve this. I deserve this. But i loved you too much. I gave you everything and now i have no more love left to give anyone but you. I wish you were reading but you`re too far away. Have too many things today. Too may tests to prepare for. I shall preoccupy myself with school and floorball. Tmrw will be meeting up with classmates to plan for CIP thingy. I shall try my best to give my all. I`m sorry mila that i make u stress about me. Don`t worry! Sigh idk what to say . I`ve run out of words. And i swear i`m immune. Amazing how life turns out the way that it does. We end up hurting the ones, the only ones we really love.I wanna break every clock, the hands of time could never move again. We could stay in this moment for the rest of our lives. Is it over now? Hey, is it over now?I wanna be your last, first kiss that you'll ever have. Im sitting here all by myself just trying to think of something to do. Trying to think of something, anything, just to keep me from thinking of you. But you know it's not working out cause you're all that's on my mind. One thought of you is all it takes to leave the rest of the world behind. Oh, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did and I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did. And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did, and you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did. I'm sitting here trying to convince myself that you're not the one for me but the more I think, the less I believe it and the more I want you here with me. I know it's not the smartest thing to do we just can't seem to get it right. But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight. I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you. i just want to forget so that it won`t hurt anymore.. |
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